alike.com.ph—The season of Christmas is definitely the most beautiful time of the year – a season of giving, love, and hope. But more than that, the holiday season is also the most awaited time of the year since it is the time when we get together with our families and friends. It is the season where we come together to feast on food, exchange gifts and share meaningful conversations with the people we love. What makes holiday reunions special is that sometimes it is the only time of the year where we get to see our distant relatives or friends. We make use of the holidays to catch up with family members or old peers through these holiday parties.
While holiday reunions are fun and all, sometimes it gets a little bit exhausting to hear one question all through out the affair: “Uy, tumaba ka ba?”
Growing up, whenever we celebrate Christmas and gather with relatives whom I haven’t seen almost the entire year, I would hear a question or a comment about weight from aunts and uncles. Sometimes it was directly addressed to me or they would tell it to my mother telling her that I have gained a little weight. It is true. Throughout the years I gain weight and did not manage to maintain my size 2 figure. It was not of a big deal to me and at the same time I have accepted the fact that it is inevitable for me to gain weight. We all do. It is just a matter on how we maintain our bodies.
To be honest, that particular question did not entirely bother me. My aunts, uncles or family friends might just be curious if I did gain a little weight. But what really concerned me is the follow-up commentaries such as “Nako, wala na manliligaw sayo niyan”, “Diet diet rin, anak” and many more. It is as if my weight was the basis of how people would like me or having the ideal body was my most important priority in life.
I do believe that it is not their pure intention to make me feel uncomfortable with my own skin. But sometimes, no matter how harmless our intentions are, we must be careful with our choice of words.
Though I may have settled some things with myself and have learned to accept my figure throughout the years, people, even my family and closest friends, must learn to be careful with what they point out to not just me but to everyone else. Many young girls who happen to experience the same thing do not react the same way I do. There are a lot of young girls and women who are insecure of their bodies regardless of their size because of the standards our society has set. Many of these girls starve themselves just to maintain a size 2 figure or achieve the “ideal” body which is very an unhealthy thing to do.
Media has done a lot of damage to young women by presenting petite and fragile body types as the ideal body type for girls. While film and media has already done so much, family members and friends should do the opposite. It should be our family and friends who should be accepting when society can’t.
I had my moments where I take a good look at myself in the mirror and point out my flaws – especially with my weight. But as I grow up, I learned that being healthy and happy is far more important than being what society wants you to be. I do not deprive myself with the food I need to eat. I hope that many young women would feel the same. In the end, we are all more than our bodies. Regardless of shape, weight, or figure – there is something special in all of us. It is a matter of how we see it.
While we accept ourselves as we are, we also should be sensitive of others. This holiday season, do not be that family member or friend who ask people about their weight. Instead, this Christmas, talk about the things that truly matter. There are far better things to chat about. After all, this may be the only time of the year you get to share a conversation.
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